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Finding your soulmate is priceless. Sure. But do you have to use a paid site to find a real relationship? Does a monthly fee really weed out people who aren't taking the process seriously?

This wasn't really an issue before 2012, but the Tinder-led surge of 30-second profiles and instant access to all single folks within 10 miles gave sites with tedious personality analyses and upscale subscriptions a run for their money — literally.

Vox said what we're all really thinking: 'At what point in the completely nightmarish process of online dating does one decide that it’s worth spending money on making that experience slightly less terrible?'

Is it worth paying for a dating site?

According to Reddit and Consumer Reports, not really. This Consumer Reports survey found that free sites actually scored better than paid sites on this when it came to overall satisfaction because they're a 'better value.' Unless you're absolutely lost without those heavy-duty matchmaking algorithms, many free sites still offer the questionnaires, detailed bios, and compatibility ratings that indicate red flags and users you wouldn't get along with.

There's no one dating site that everyone is particularly psyched about. Swiping exhaustion and creepily persistent users are an omnipresent part of all online dating. Sorry, but a paid subscription isn't a metal detector that pulls all of the upstanding, faithful singles up out of the crowd. When there are sites that can offer millions of users for free and success stories to prove they work, why not try them before spending $40 per month elsewhere?

A hefty price point doesn't guarantee the absence of fakes or catfishes, either. (In 2019, some guy on match posed as a millionaire and stole $80,000 from the woman he was talking to.) Many free sites are just as big on privacy and safety, requiring users to verify themselves through Facebook to increase transparency about age and first names. No paid sites have the safety features that Tinder does, which is the first of the Match Group apps to offer 911 assistance and location services to make meeting a stranger safer.

The aesthetic experience certainly isn't what your money is going toward, either. Many of the older, subscription-based sites have been slow to modernize their UX designs, still relying on the very 2000s style of bombarding you with notifications for every wink, message, and whatever else.

Can you actually fall in love with someone online?

We've all accepted that online dating is great for finding a friend with benefits, but telling family members that it's getting serious with that person you met online still takes convincing. However, recent studies show that meeting online can foster a pretty reliable romantic foundation.

A 2017 study cited in the MIT Technology Review found that people who meet online are more likely to be compatible and have a better chance at a healthy marriage if they decide to get hitched. Another study found that heterosexual couples who met online were quicker to tie the knot. These stats don't take anything from correlation to causation, but they do make the case that people who sign up for dating sites that require thoughtful responses are in a better spot to settle down.

There's an unspoken assumption that people on free dating sites are young, horny people with no disposable income and that people on paid dating site are mature, employed individuals who are ready to settle down. But eharmony, Match, Tinder, and OkCupid have rather similar age demographics, all with surprisingly close splits between people in their 20s, 30s, and 40s.

Which dating sites are actually free?

Waters get muddied when basically every damn dating site has some sort of paid and free version. True free apps let users do all of this as a baseline, and then offer paid perks such as the ability to see everyone who has swiped right on you or boosting your profile for a certain amount of time. Free-but-not-really apps are the ones that are technically free to use, but you have to pay to do just about anything including read or respond to messages.

Premium memberships of freemium apps are an affordable way to give more control over your pool of potential boos, but they probably don't do much to expedite the grueling swiping process. When Tinder released Tinder Gold, it beat out Candy Crush as the Apple Store's top-grossing app. People were that willing to pay to see who swiped right on them. That might be handy knowledge if you're looking to get laid, but it's hard to tell if it would help find someone that you like enough to share your life with. No one I know has kept a paid version of a free app for more than a month.

At any rate, there's a certain serendipitous feeling that comes with the possibility that, out of the millions of users Hinge could have shown you that day, your soulmate popped up in the crowd of 10 likes you can give out per day (compared to the unlimited likes that come with Hinge Preferred).

These are the best free dating sites for finding a serious relationship:

HomeDating in USATOP 10: Best Dating Sites in the USA (2020)

What are the best dating sites in the USA in 2020?

To that question, there’s no one answer..

It really depends on who you are:

  • Are you, for example, 22 or 57 years old?
  • Looking for a serious relationship, one-night stand or maybe just new friends..?
  • Your ethnicity, education, religion and sexual orientation might also play a role in choosing the right site.

There are dating sites for everyone and Datermeister – the He-Man of the Dating Universe – is here to guide you to the dating site which is right for you.

And by the way:

Even though everyone is talking about dating apps like Tinder, truth is that most people have MUCH better success on the good old dating sites.

So get ready to score yourself a date – here’s our list of 10 best US dating sites – with a brief introduction to each one.

And be sure to read until the end because we’ve got a few more bonus niche dating sites + 7 quick tips to get a successful start in online dating.

Let’s start with the TOP 10:

1. Match.com – probably the best dating site in the USA?

Match.com – the Mickey D’s of online dating – has been around since the mid-1990’s. So it’s probably older than some of you reading this.

It is probably the best dating site in the USA to get started – no matter what your background is. It’s for all ages (as long as you’re 18 or over), all ethnicities, religious backgrounds and so on..

Match.com gets over 40 million visitors each month so you will not run out of singles profiles and pictures to browse through!*. But, is Match’s time already over in 2020? Are there better sites out there? Keep reading our list of American dating sites to find out:

2. EliteSingles.com – best for 30+ educated and successful singles

EliteSingles.com is a perfect place to meet educated and/or career driven singles.

The site was launched in the US in late 2016 but has become extremely popular among singles who are looking for a high class dating site. Now, in 2020, the EliteSingles.com site attracts over 1 million visitors per month!*

When you join the site, you fill out a personality test. Once it’s done, you will see some partner suggestions who are the most suitable for you. Even studies show that people with the same level of education and/or values form longer lasting and happier relationships. So this site is definitely worth a try if you want to find your true soulmate.

It’s not for everyone, though:

We would recommend it if you’re around 30 or over and have a higher education level. Or maybe you’re a self made man or woman and want to meet other successful and ambitious singles? EliteSingles is for people who know what they want and don’t want to play around on the free dating sites.

Read also our Elite Singles Review (2020)

Another big user group on this site seem to be the 50+ and 60+ singles who are conquering online dating sites faster than ever. EliteSingles.com is definitely a great choice for an overall more mature online dating experience.

3. POF – most popular and best FREE dating site in USA?

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POF.com aka PlentyOfFish is one of the most popular dating sites in the United States. The site gets a whopping 100+ million* visitors per month.

Why is it so popular?

Probably the biggest reason is that it’s completely free to use. At first this sounds like an awesome deal, right? Sure, you should definitely go check it out if you’re looking for a 100 % free dating site in the US.

But remember that free online dating sites usually attract a lot of not-so-serious people who are just playing around (or even scammers). Also women get tons of approaches by guys on free sites. So you guys out there – you have to put some serious effort in your dating profile AND in your first message when approaching the ladies.

4. SilverSingles – best dating site in the USA for 50+ singles?

SilverSingles.com is only for singles over 50.

Of course the other sites on this list also have tons of over 50-year-olds but SilverSingles.com caters only to the mature men and women. And there truly is a demand for sites like this. The 50+ crowd have been the fastest growing user group on online dating sites in the USA for the last 5-10 years in our estimations.

Read also: Top 5 Dating Sites for people over 50!

SilverSingles.com has a nice and clean website design and it’s easy to use. Upon joining you will fill out a personality test which is then used to find the best matching partner candidates for you. It is definitely our pick also for the best dating site for seniors. There is no age limit on the online dating sites so no matter how old you are, it’s time to turn your swag on and get dating again!

5. eharmony – best US dating site to find your true soul mate?

eharmony.com is definitely one of the best dating sites in USA. It is only for singles who are looking for something a bit more serious and more meaningful connections with other people.

When you join the site, you fill out a personality test. The results are then used to match you with users who are the best matches for you. It’s developed by experts in psychology who really know what a good relationship is made of. Just by filling out the test you will maybe get some “aha moments” about what to look for in a relationship. Eharmony is therefore probably the best dating site for serious relationships.

And they even give a guarantee for the matches they offer you in the first 3 months. If you’re not satisfied, you get 3 months more for FREE. Their site gets over 5 million visitors per month so you truly have an excellent chance of meeting someone special.

6. ChristianMingle.com – best dating site for Christian singles?

ChristianMingle.com is probably the best dating site in the USA for Christian singles. The website gets over 1 million visitors per month so you will have tons of profiles to go through!

As you might agree, it can be difficult to meet singles with Christian values in todays world. But you are not alone. You can meet other Christian singles on the mainstream sites such as Match or you can go on the christian only dating sites. And probably the biggest and best dating site for Christians is the good old Christian Mingle.

7. BlackPeopleMeet.com – biggest dating site for black singles in the US

BlackPeopleMeet.com has become extremely popular among black singles in America.

There are around 40 million African Americans in the US so there definitely is a big market for black dating sites. While Match.com and other mainstream sites have a lot of black singles, here on BlackPeopleMeet.com you don’t have to be guessing what ethnicity the other singles are interested in. BlackPeopleMeet.com gets around 5 million site visitors per month and that’s a LOT. So no matter if you’re in a big or a smaller city, there should be a good amount of men and women on this site for you.

BlackPeopleMeet.com also have a dating app to go with the same log in details where you can see profiles and either like/dislike them in the same style as in Tinder.

Register for free at BlackPeopleMeet.com

8. AdultFriendFinder – best dating site in USA for hook ups

Are you single or in a relationship and want just sexual adventures?

If yes, AdultFriendFinder.com is probably your best bet.

When you join this site, you know that everyone is there for the same reason – to get laid. Or at least to get some sexual action going on through your screen. You can search for users according to their physical appearance, location and even fetishes. So there’s no need for chit chat about your favorite color or TV series, here you can go straight to the point.

But is AdultFriendFinder legit? Often these adult dating sites can be a bit “scammy”. Well, as always, you shouldn’t immediately trust all users (anyone can put up a fake photo) but:

AFF has been around since 1996 and today, in 2020, the site gets over 60 million visitors each month! And in the US alone around 40+ million. So it is an extremely popular adult dating site for singles, swingers and even people who are already in a relationship.

9. OkCupid – a free site for a bit more “alternative” and younger crowd

OkCupid is another popular and free dating site in the US.

Although they get tens of millions of visitors on the site per month, it’s still a bit more of an alternative or “hipster” kind of dating site. It’s also good for people who have less mainstream sexual orientations or they feel that they represent a different gender.

You can also search for singles in other countries as OkCupid is popular in Canada and Europe as well. They also have a well functioning dating app (which is rarely the case when dating sites try to make an app to go with their main site).

On OkCupid you can get started for free (and send messages to other people) and if you want more features, they will cost you a bit of money.

10. SingleParentMeet.com – you guessed it – a dating site for single moms and dads

SingleParentMeet.com is one of the best dating sites in the US for single parents.

Now, of course on the mainstream sites you can also search with filters regarding if the person has kids or not. But on this site, you can be sure that everyone “is OK” with the fact that you have kids.

SingleParentMeet.com is a legit dating site which gets an estimated 2 million site visitors per month in the US. That’s a nice number for a niche dating site. But with todays divorce rates, there are millions of single parents out there who want to DATE!

So go and register, and organize yourself a date with some hot mom or dad.

A few more sites for niche dating in the USA:

Ok, so we just squeezed the best dating sites in USA in to a TOP 10 list. But there’s more:

If you are looking for more of “niche” dating sites, there are literally thousands of smaller niche dating sites in USA. Here’s a few tips on what’s out there:

  • Jewish dating sites: JDate.com is probably the most popular US dating site for Jewish singles
  • Muslim dating sites: there are several muslim dating sites – for example muslima.com is popular both in the USA and internationally
  • Hispanic dating: you could check out AmoLatina.com – it’s a popular latino dating site in the US and South America.
  • Spiritual dating: if you want to meet other open minded and spiritual singles, probably SpiritualSingles.com is your choice.
  • Farmer dating: finding a partner that is suitable for the farmer lifestyle can be tough in today’s world. But, FarmersOnly.com is an extremely popular dating site in the US attracting millions of visitors each month.
  • Gay and lesbian dating sites: of course there is Grindr – the father of all dating apps – for gay guys. But if you’re gay or lesbian and want to find a bit more serious dating site, your best bet is usually Match.com. Just choose the gender you are looking for and you are ready to mingle!

There are literally hundreds, if not thousands, of different dating sites in America but we will not expand this list any further.

And remember: the mainstream sites – such as Match.com – also have filters to search for singles with a certain religion, ethnicity, profession and so on. So we recommend starting on the TOP 10 sites and then proceeding to the niche dating sites if you don’t find interesting people on the mainstream sites.

7 quick tips to succeed on dating sites

We won’t go too deep in to the subject of how to succeed on dating sites but here’s 7 quick tips which you should skim through before you get started:

#1: Add a profile photo

First, a question to you:

Would you yourself answer to a person who has no photo on a dating site?

Probably not, right?

Add a profile photo and you will get 10 times more messaging going on with other users. This is a common mistake, especially for men. Just look in your (digital) photo albums for some nice photos from your last holiday for example (activity photos work like a charm!)

#2: On your profile text remember just 2 main rules:

When you fill your profile text, explain who you are and what you enjoy in life. Secondly, describe what you are looking for and what kind of people you are hoping to meet or enjoy being around with.

Often when we’re looking through dating sites we see people just talking about themselves. So, just write something about what kind of people you want to meet. Then it’s much easier for the reader to identify with you and maybe they’ll approach you!

#3: Keep the tone positive

When you’re writing your profile text, concentrate on positives rather than negatives. Example: Write what you like in other people and don’t make a list of what you DON’T like. Positivity always attracts more people than negativity.

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#4: Send interesting and engaging first messages

As a general rule for dating sites and apps:

Don’t just send a simple ”hello” or ”what’s up?” as a first message.

Instead, comment on something you saw on the person’s profile or at least mention their name in your message.. often people send these ”mass messages” to many people which don’t feel very personal. Just try complimenting some of their photos or asking something specific about what they wrote in their profile. When you ask something specific (and not just a vague “how’s it going?”), there’s a much higher chance of getting a reply.

#5: Go on a date quickly (rather than chatting forever)

Don’t hesitate to go on a ”real” date soon after getting to know someone online. Sometimes people can chat forever on dating sites and even fall in love via the keyboard, but then in real life, the chemistry is missing. Just go for a coffee in a public place without stressing too much about it.

But, remember also this next point:

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#6: Safety (don’t fall for romance scams on dating sites!)

On the internet anyone can pretend to be something they are not. Especially on free dating sites (such as POF) there can be a lot of scammers around. Or on the dating sites which are for a bit older crowd. If someone asks for money, never ever send anything. People can fake their photo and their whole life story. In certain parts of the world there are professional romance scammers who do this as a full-time “job”. They make you fall in love with them, then they make up a story about an accident or some emergency, then they ask you to send them money. Don’t fall for these scams. Usually the safest bet is to talk to local singles who are up for a date in a neutral and safe place such as a café or a bar.

#7: Be patient

Even if your first or third or seventh date fails, don’t quit.

It’s not easy finding the right one so don’t get too frustrated. Don’t get cynical, keep talking to people and keep going on dates with a positive mind. You’ll hit the jackpot eventually when you stay patient and positive!

Conclusion

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Are you ready to crush your single status?

Scroll back up and start joining the sites which fit you the best. You can try many of them – it just takes a minute or two to join each one so why not try?

Right now, in the beginning of 2020, Datermeister’s favorite is EliteSingles.com – especially if you are over with the shallow atmosphere of Tinder and you’re looking for something a bit more serious.

But, now it’s your turn. What is the best dating site in the USA and why? Leave a comment below.

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*source for website traffic statistics: Similarweb.com